This post is going be in 2 folds; that is, “The 10 reasons why guys cannot keep their mouth shut after getting laid”
and the opposite, which is “10 reasons why girls can ALWAYS keep their mouth shut after getting laid”, the second fold would come in a new thread on a later date which would not take too long sha….. know you guys would be eager to read it so ANTICIPATE in advance……
The post is inspired by the following; absolute-natural-occurrences, personal-experiences ,facts, and finally last but not the least the king, master and frequent user of the phrase “10 things” that I know ere on NL ie tosyne2much, I like calling him “Mr 10 things” ( Mr 10T’s 4 short). Shout out to vikiz, wrist-bangle, tight pucci, lala and other bombing guys that are really making nairaland 2 be a bubbling arena. Without wasting much time beating about the bush, lets start, straight up……
1.) SOME GIRLS PLAY REALLY HARD: After spending much of our savings, little earnings from NB and bet9ja, pocket-money on Brazilian-hair, recharge cards, chicken-rebublic takeaway, sharwarma, ice-cream, trips and expensive dates some girls still do “strong-head” and vehemently refuse our love advances and approaches towards them, when they hear us asking them to be our girlfriend, that’s when you would be hearing somethn like; “L-beans pls leave that aside, we would talk about it later”……mtchwww…. like sey person won build mansion for friendzone….. when the guy finally gets into her kitty.k he would not hesitate in any opportunity given to him and those not given to gist his guys, peepz nd even some of his female friends how he finally devoured and smashed the hell out of that kitty punny.
2.) SWEETNESS: no1 including I would disagree with the fact that sex is sweet, but some kind of sex can’t just keep a guy’s mouth shut most especially when the girl involved is still tight and blessed with a toolzcossy figure, most guys usually cannot wait to tell any1 that cares to listen about their unforgettable sexual experience with the said girl.
3.) BOREDOM: It is normally said that where 2-3 guys are seated together girls are involved, yes! That’s quite true and let me add this to that popular adage, they are not only talking about girls but are also discussing and dissecting their sexual experience with their female counterparts, teachers, lecturers, aristos, and FWB’s, most times, when they are just bored is the best opportunity to gist about their sexual adventures with the opposite sex.
4.) SOME GUYS ARE JUST IMMATURE: This would not be complete if I don’t mention this point, Though some guys see this as a normal stuff , it’s simply immature to start saying up and down to any1 who cares to listen how you fu*ked your principal/VC’s daughter or your head girl. To all those girls out there that think its’s only her and her FWB that knows or believe that’s had sex, BIG SHOUT AWT to you…. You know why? Am happy to tell you that once you’ve slept with a guy another 5 guys are aware of it, those 5 guys av informed another set of 6 guys, see as the number keeps multiplying……. You know, its really a small world… continue shaking ur yanshe dhr…. We already no ur lil secret!.
5.) PLEASURE SAKES: Most guys derive pleasure in gisting about their sexual escapades …. Don’t blame them, they just wanna have fun with their cliques or gang of friends and listen to various experiences, Of course if Hot-pucci, vikiz, Lbeans, tosyne2much, wrist-bangle and 2 of his brothers from another mother are gathered around a table with few drinks and gisting about their sexual adventures it would definitely be a pleasurable and interesting gist that you sef go won join us…… lol!
6.) COMPETITION: After chopping small raba from Bet9ja, Nairabet, baba-ijebu, and the likes, they still wantu chop their friends money, so they place bets with one or 2 of their also promiscuous paddy’s to sleep with a popular campus babe that’s always claiming “stubborn”. After doing this successfully they derive so much joy in giving back-2-back stories on how they finally murdered the “stubborn-girl’s” pucci, they even atimes go as far as recording how the sex went with the girl to prove and show their friends to watch. Don’t know why ooooo……. But if me sef see video I go watch ooo……4get!
7.) PRIDE: some guys are just too proud…. A conversation ensued between 2 good friends named legundarybeans and tosyne2much after a sundae service:
L-beans: Mr 10 T’s ao far now?
Tosyne2much: I dey o, how ur side?
L-beans: (smiling sheepishly) omo I just dey jubilate since the day b4 ystd.
Tosyne2much: (extremely inquisitive) eeh eeh, ao far now? Wetin won cause that one naw?, why you dey happy like that? wetin cause d jubilation?
L-beans: Omo shey you sabi that VP of chemistry dept?
Tosyne2much: Guy c’mon! yes now! Diekara? Who no go sabi that girl wey get calabash yanshe and aunty cossy’s boobz
L-beans: enh enh na that girl, yes! Na she! You sabi ham…… omo I just kpansh her some 2 days ago o, I just dey happy cos according to my findings na me be the 1st person wey go reach there for the whole of MCB dept, nd yu know as we plenty reach nw?…. na since Friday I just dey happy na why me just dey jubilate up and down ooo…
Tosyne2much: (kneels down and begins to hail) eeeh L-B BABA, I juba 4 you! Eeeh! I troway salute! Eeeh na you get mouth pass! Eeeh! Baddest!) ……….I get like 3 of my guys wey bin don try that babe parole… omo she no gree for them o, omo na you o!
L-beans: (feeling himself; …for hin dirty mind, hin dey feel absolutely proud like sey hin jus travel 2 more than 10 countries in the last 11 months like pa buhari, still feeling proud sey tosyne dey hail ham …like sey hin just win $1m)
Abeg leave that thing jorh tosyne, na small thing, I still get some other targets, that one don go already…..
(light fades… curtin drops)
8.) ACCOMPLISHMENT AND JOY: Since most guys feel accomplished and have derived lots of joy in dissecting their “longthroated 4” punnani, they simply can’t wait to give unending gist to any1 that cares to listen, atimes their children yes! Av seen this times without numba(4 highly promiscuous Dads) their high sch and college adventures on how they f**kd over 100 girls in their youth age…..like sey them dey give gold medal for ham…lol!
9.) TARGET AND BOASTFUL ATTITUDE: some guys go as far as setting targets for the number of kitty.k they plan on hitting within a certain period of time. Well at this point I must say this little bit of truth, am very guilty of this and I usually make sure I set nd hit my target b4 the end of each semester!
Boasting; Though am NOT guilty of this, some guys are extremely boastful and cannot close that mouth of theirs in bragging to their friends and peers on how they fucked a girl and went 8 consecutive rounds, when we all know that they cannot last more than 1½ rounds……… that’s how flexy(nt real name sha) was telling us how he fucked a girl for 3 hours 45mins, chai baba you dey lie!, I screamed!, Not until I frustrated him to say the real truth b4 he now reduced it and said it was only for 2hrs 45mins ….lol! why would I want to believe that, 2hrs 45 gini? Ahn ahn how come? ….. when no be sey you won go buy PMS for TOTAL during scarcity or subsidy period.
10.) PEER PRESSURE: Lots of guys have been respondn positively to peer pressure since time immemorial, quite often than not, whenever they are with their friends gisting and their friends are giving gist of how they went to bang a girl in ABATI barracks and other sexual escapades , they keep mute and look like babies that are still in incubator all bcos they don’t have any gist to drop or share, but as soon as they manage nd struggle to get 1 kitty puna , the victim would be more popular than Christiana amanpour for that period of time cos they won’t cease to stop telling any1 that cares to listen about how they smashed the putty.
(written from a virgin mind)……..
Aaaah! I must surely not forget not to stop at this point , though the list is endless, I just have to drop my pen ere, do not feel less to drop your own points, feel free cos it’s a freeworld…….oops! my saloon name…..lol! bye for now guys…. Special shout awt to all NL’s don’t forget to ANTICIPATE the opposite thread, its coming your way soon…. “10 reasons why girls can always shut their mouth after their sexual escapades”
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